Did you get permission to be an artist?
If I asked you: “Have you got permission to be an artist?” you might have thought: “What is she talking about? I am a grown-up… I don’t need anyone’s permission to make art…”
Truth is (not) making art has everything to do with permissions – especially if you used to be a smart little girl who wanted to please parents and teachers. I sure was one.
I had parents who loved me, supported me, and tried to give me everything they thought I needed. But they were afraid I would not be able to make a living as an artist. So my well-meaning father used to tell me: “Art can always be a hobby of yours.” (Years later, I even made an art installation called “I make bread that cannot be eaten” – as a reference to that.)
So for the first three years of studying Computer Science at the University, I thought I would never become an artist. But I kept drawing and painting anyways.
My art instructor thought I would be admitted to Fine Arts if only I took the entrance exams. My friend’s mother (who was an artist) thought so, too (I remember her saying: “If YOU don’t believe you are talented, who will?”)
And then, one April day, (although I was only 20 years old at the time) I pictured myself as a grandmother saying to my grandchildren with regret: “What would my life be like if only I went to art school…” You might think it was cheesy (and it was), but THAT was how I finally made myself take the entrance exams. Luckily for me, when I told my parents I was accepted (and would study both Computer Science AND Painting – which I did!) they encouraged me.
If you did not get permission to be an artist as a young person, please read on (and if you did – I am very happy for you).
Years may pass, but the creative little girl you used to be is still inside, waiting. If you still desire to make art and can’t indulge in creativity, your inner artist might need permission to become the artist she was meant to be.
Today obviously, your parents or teachers won’t give this permission to you.
Today, you need to give it yourself.
So think about this for a while, and then do it.
Even it feels a bit weird.
Even if, from time to time, you have to repeat it to yourself.